One of the most common questions I get asked is if I think a relationship is healthy. This is such an important question to ask, and there aren't any really clear answers, but there are a few guideposts that can help you identify unhealthy patterns worth working on.
Here are some of the guidelines I recommend to know if you are in a healthy place together. If you are in an unhealthy spot, or you just need a little tune-up give me a call for a free consult and let's see if I can help you make changes today.
Characteristics of a healthy relationship
You can talk openly with others outside the relationship
You have shared and individual friends
You hold each other to the same high standards
You encourage each other’s independent goals
You have a shared idea of where you will go in the future
You support each other's health and grow one another's confidence
You enjoy and celebrate each other’s successes
Your boundaries are respected by your partner
You enjoy spending time apart and respect each other’s need for space
You share a sense of positive regard, warmth, respect, and kindness with your partner
You have special jokes, rituals, dates, events you share regularly
You feel physically and emotionally safe in each other’s presence
You can be honest, an trust you are hearing the truth from your partner
You value your differences and respectfully disagree
None of the items on this list mean your relationship is doomed. Instead they could mean your relationship's health requires attention. You might need help making changes together.
Call a professional for a consult or referral near you. You can be even stronger together and you can learn healthy relationship patterns.
If you think your relationship might be unsafe please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1.800.799.7233
Gina Senarighi, MS, MA, CPC is a sex educator and relationship coach specializing in polyamory, open relationships, jealousy, LGBTQ issues and infidelity.
She can help you:
- rediscover passion in long-term relationships
- repair trust after infidelity or dishonesty
- move past jealousy, insecurity or codependent patterns
- open your relationship or practice polyamory with care
- resolve sexual dysfunction and disconnect
- break unhealthy communication patterns in your relationship
Contact her for a free consultation to see if working with her is right for you.
Click here to download her free guides to strengthen your relationship (monogamous or not).