Nearly every couple I work with wants to know the pros and cons of choosing an open relationship. You can read these previous posts to learn more about the benefits and reasons people choose polyamory or nonmonogamy.
Today I want to share a list of the benefits to choosing an open relationship.
Common Benefits of Nonmonogamy
I don't feel confined
Plenty of people choose nonmonogamy to experience more freedom or autonomy in relationships- and open relationships can certainly provide freedoms.
Successful nonmonogamous couples are able to acknowledge attraction to people outside the relationship without creating turmoil- even if that attraction is never acted upon. That simple freedom releases a lot of tension for many couples (even monogamous ones).
Monogamy didn't work in the past
So many of my couples tell me they came to the decision to try polyamory because their past relationships involved cheating and they want to create more open communication moving forward.
Even couples who haven't experienced infidelity often tell me they simply don't believe (philosophically or politically) in the traditional monogamous paradigm. They want to break free from that model.
I get diverse sexual experience
One benefit to nonmonogamy can be sex with more people. More people means diverse and different experiences. You get to explore more with more people.
I get diverse romantic and emotional experience
Often overlooked, another great benefit to nonmonogamy is the diversity of emotional connections and kinds of relationships possible. More people means diverse and different experiences. You get to explore more with more people- emotionally.
I don't feel pressure to meet all my partners' needs
While polyamorous couples certainly care about their partners' needs, they can let go of the pressure to meet all of them (ie. "you complete me").
Increased personal growth/self-awareness
If you want to work on your shit (jealousy, attachment, abandonment, codependence, insecurity, judgment...), polyamory is certainly a fast-track to personal development. I'm not suggesting polyamorous people are highly enlightened and have worked everything out, but to be successful you have to commit to some self-work. And if self-work is your interest this can be a major benefit to nonmonogamy.
If you want support as you open your relationship give me a call for a consultation. I'm happy to help you nurture your relationship (monogamous or otherwise).
She can help you:
- rediscover passion in long-term relationships
- repair trust after infidelity or dishonesty
- move past jealousy, insecurity or codependent patterns
- open your relationship or practice polyamory with care
- resolve sexual dysfunction and disconnect
- break unhealthy communication patterns in your relationship
Contact her for a free consultation to see if working with her is right for you.